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(10:05 am - 11.18.2001 - hey hey big spender - i feel  ) yay. so since i've got a tiny bit of cash in my bank account, let the spending spree begin!!! hehe. i've spent about $50 online tonite. i got a cheap 3 month gold diaryland membership. it hasn't kicked in yet, so i can't have fun yet! darnit. just what i need, more options to change my format. hehe. i'm addicted to changing this things appearance daily! i think i'm done spending money for today. weird how you can spend money without even going out of your house. the anti-socialist's dream. lol. i love it! but i'm a spendaholic. if i have $$, i spend it aimlessly. i buy whatever i want, for the most part. that's how i ran out of cash so fast before. you'd think i'd learn from that? no. damn my torrid ways. or something. i'm a master of disaster. hehe. yep. damnit. i wish my membership would kick in. i wanna see how badly i can funk up my page. funk up? yes. sure. i think for now i'll just bore you by rambling on about nothing! yay! aren't you xcited? yes, i knew you were. ok, you can stop snoring now. please. i hate reading the schedule at work. i always read it wrong. i'm pretty sure i don't work tonite. lol. almost positive. just to be sure, i'll be ready around 11pm, so if i get a call shortly after that, i can go into work. i know i work three days straight this week (including thanksgiving) but i can't remember what day it begins. probably monday? off tuesday. work wed, thurs, and fri. off sat. yes. i believe that is my schedule this week. but don't quote me. brrr. it's cold. how come the furnace doesn't come on when i'm home? damnit! hold on! grr. ok. well i just found out that the only radio station i listen to around here the x fired my favorite dj lenny! damn. now i'm sad! they are going to receive some very angry emails. lenny was awesome. all i had to do was email him with a new band name and song, and he'd put it on his show. i loved lenny damnit. they should have gotten rid of this other highly annoying bitchy dj, debbie "puke me" wilde. she's so annoying she even put like 10 pictures of herself on the page. with nothing else. god. how i dislike her. when i saw her before stroke9 went on at the resurgence festival, i wanted to choke her. there isn't a thing about her that isn't annoying to me. i just got kicked offline cause mom left a message. yuck. she didn't sound so happy. downright upset that i don't call her 'several times a week' to tell her what's going on. ehhh. i never call anyone. never call, never talk. yep. maybe i'll call her later on. she really only calls when she's got some new news, so something has to be up. i've been browsing more and more diaryland members and more and more i'm seeing that they've got their diary reviewed. i've been thinking about getting mine done, but i don't want to get a bad score. some of the reviewers are really kind and give high scores to what i think are crappy diaries. but some of them are brutal. why would i want someone to rate my writings anyways? lol. maybe i will just for a laugh. i like the one reviewer's style. he lists lots of good points and also tons of bad points about your diary, and your writing. i'm curious. i'll do it on a 'impulse' click. just like i did with the gold membership. justin called tonite. talked for a good bit. i'm happy with our relationship right now. but he knows he's using me. lol. i flat out told him that i loved how he calls me when he's having problems, etc. but when i want to talk to him (whenever that is) he's never there. i know he doesn't care about me as much as i care about him. if he did, he would have found my diary by now. if he did, i'd have to change a bit of former entries. lol. i decided i like having saturday nite off. hehe. i had such a good time tonite. well, yeah. i'll leave it at that. i'm xcited. a video (estd2) i've been waiting over a year to come out, is finally coming out on december 11th! yay! maybe that's what i'll get starz for christmas. hehe. since i did drag her to the concert. i really hope we're on there. i freaked out when i went on 311music.com yesterday and read the happenings page. i wonder who took the pics of the 311 halloween concert. i know gary told me he was going. if he took the pics that'd be awesome. referring to yesterday's entry about dreams... i had another one last nite! i couldn't tell whether it was a dream, or just my very vivid imagination. i dreamt that i was watching the news and they were saying to go outside tonite and look up at the sky, cause something was going to happen that rarely ever happens. something about all this dust, and there would be tons of shooting stars (can't remember the xact details). well i went outside in my dream and what i saw in the sky was amazing. so neat! and when i woke up, and was conscience for a few hours, i remembered the 'dream' and i desperately tried to think if it was reality or not. i believe it was. but by the time i got outside (4am) all i could see was fog. damn weather. figures. ok did that last paragraph make any sense? ohhh fuck it! who cares. holy hell! i just got an email from nick! damn! so i spent a little time and replied to him while i felt like it. i haven't gotten an email from that kid for like 3 months! hehe. yuck, now i need lyrics. can i just mention how hot spider one is!!!!?!? damn. along with chester and brandon boyd and thom yorke. yum. ok ok, i'm done. what's pleasing to the eye-in the delusion of my sight-is not what i find-when i reach into the light-i have lost my mind-i'm walking through time-deluded as the next guy-pretending and hoping to find-that distant peace of mind ~*~liz
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